Frank, leaving on a Jet Plane, headed for somewhere near the Ukraine. Frank leaves for Russia tomorrow morning, and we wish him good luck..
posted by The H.Bomb| 10:14 PM | email | archive

Shine a Light on Russia. Got a chance to see the new Scorsese take on The Rolling Stones Bigger Bang show in 2006. If you get a chance to go see it, go see it at the IMAX, because they have the loudest sound available. So close to the concert action, you'll go deaf. The great bonus is that you won't sweat too.

The ol' Father-in-Law leaves for Russia on the 24th, so this is going to be a busy month for all of us. If I hadn't mentioned it before, Frank was offered a job over there at the Embassy to make sure Freedom Rings at 110 volts. In the meantime, I've been Sue's bitch on Craigslist, trying to get stuff posted and sold (just kidding). If anybody needs a sweet Bowflex that has been personally used and sweated on by yours truly, look no further.
posted by The H.Bomb| 9:44 PM | email | archive

This post is to make up for Tues-Wednesday-and today's. My latest mental flub is that of my zipper. I've gone straight to buckling my belt after using the Men's room and completely neglecting the almighty zipper. Many a time has been spent that I have caught this flub in time and saved myself some embarrassment. Other times, not so lucky.

I'm posting this for any patent disputes later, but I'm going to devise a system that will automatically zip your zipper. I'm not too sure how this will work (probably pneumatic pump the size of a roll of quarters strapped to your crotch area). For those not so gifted, the pump can come in plantain sizes as well.
posted by The H.Bomb| 1:16 PM | email | archive

Manual Labor. I was forced into a labor camp this weekend to haul landscape rocks from the back of my father-in-law's truck. I felt like Andy Dupre' in The Shawshank Redemption, when he's tarring the top of that prison building. After it was over, I was allowed visitation rights with my family.

Em told me that night, "You're like the son he never had, the one that would help him with yard work or whatever." In reply, I said, "You mean the day laborer he never had." She quietly nodded in agreement.

If anybody needs me, I'll be at the Home Depot over on IH-35 looking for work (Landscaping, Framing or Tile Work. Or Photography.)
posted by The H.Bomb| 10:03 PM | email | archive

New BSG. Did you see tonight's Battlestar Galactica? Did it blow your frack'n mind? Why or why not?

Biggest disappointment was that there was no disappointment. If that didn't get you stuck in a loop, nothing will.
posted by The H.Bomb| 10:58 PM | email | archive

Common IT questions. Over the course of my short IT Career, there have been some doozy of a question been asked our way. Some of my favorites:

1.) Did you guys shut down the internet? Yes, we turned the big f--- switch in our Data Center that says "INTERWEB" off.
2.) How can I get rid of all this Spam? Stop surfing porn at work.
3.) There's something wrong with my computer. Yes, you're using it.
4.) My computer is really slow. See #2.
5.) Do you know why my sister can't email me? Our FWD Funny Joke filter is working correctly.

There are countless others I'll add at a later date.
posted by The H.Bomb| 3:42 PM | email | archive

Sprint blues. So we finally switched our personal accounts over to AT&T, but Sprint gave me a two week long saga of enticing us with such cutting edge phones such as the Motorola RAZR. They finally closed our service today and it was a good run-- but the entire industry has left them in the dust and they are hemorrhaging pretty bad right now.
posted by The H.Bomb| 7:03 PM | email | archive

28 Days/Weeks later. Shortly after my Late-Bachelor period began the Neo-Romantic-Comedy Era of my life. During this time, I was dating Em and was only allowed to watch movies that included:

1.) A romantic sub-plot of which the suitor was impossibly unable to date the love interest.
2.) A hip soundtrack that included some of the (then) latest melodramatic indie artists.
3.) Hugh Grant.

Last Friday I was able to finally watch 28 Days Later, a film that has eluded me for quite some time. Not only was Em unwilling to see it, I never really had a chance to see it myself. To put it mildly, I was not disappointed. Definitely one of the best zombie-esque movies ever, and to all you out there who have already seen it, now I know.
posted by The H.Bomb| 1:38 PM | email | archive

Well. I decided to go ahead and try to post something, anything, at least for the month of April. While the mild excitement of my mostly melancholy 20's has led way to the roaring contentment of my 30's, I think there should be bits of interest strewn somewhere.

This weekend, Em, Daniel and I ran walked the Capitol 10K. It was my first time walking it, and I have to say: "Boy, are my thighs tired." (I say this with a straight face and without any hint of g@y innuendo). There were a couple blunders made on my part by walking it with cargo shorts and a hoodie (Em had hers on too) as well as not hydrating myself up to the point of the event (I have to walk 6 miles tomorrow, another beer? Why the f-- not!!).

It's a little unnerving seeing grown men in such short shorts, but I have to take the bad with the good, which were the women running in such short shorts. The culmination of the event was about 4.5 miles into it and Em, gasping for air, said: "Don't make me laugh anymore, I'm too tired."
posted by The H.Bomb| 10:43 AM | email | archive

Sorry for the lack of updates.. I might need to put the blog on life support until life slows down a bit. I'll be attending St. Edwards this summer for a hardcore 5 semesters of "Let's get this the f-- over with" type of education, so there won't be much to tell anyways. For the two (maybe three) who still check on this page: thanks.
posted by The H.Bomb| 8:57 PM | email | archive